Don't misunderstand. I'm not saying it's about me. The reason I social dance is because it's about US. Two people creating together... something funny, something sexy, it doesn't matter what, as long as both opinions matter in the conversation (dance being a conversation you have without the words). Why would you talk to someone if you don't care what they say, anyway?!
Granted, I did ask this man to dance. But, Wow!, do I wish now he would have said, "No, thanks", b/c he didn't seem to care about my being there at all. I knew his style was flamboyant, but it was a Bachata, so I assumed he would be a tad more chill. Wrong!
His movement was loud and disjointed. His fingertips pressed into my back (Hate it!). His conviction that he was the superior dancer dripped from every scoff he gave if I missed a lead - which happened a grand total of two times toward the beginning of the song while I was still trying to decipher the lead through the yelling his body was doing.
It was basically the total opposite of what dancing should be! And for a split, very sad, second, I understood why women, (people, really - b/c I've heard horror stories about female partners, too) give up social dancing. If I ran into people like this often, I'd pursue another career!
Why do I tell you all this? Why not just vent in my journal like a normal person? So you can be - scratch that - so WE can all be better partners - both in life and dancing! If you engage in conversation with someone, whether with the body or otherwise, make it a conversation you both enjoy. It's not that hard to do. Just make them feel like their being there matters to you. ... Then you might get them hot and bothered in the right way;)
See you on the hardwood!